Well, then, you must know a young gentleman courted me.

I forget whether I liked him or not; but you will fancy I hated him, for I promised to marry him.

You must understand, gentlemen, that I was sent into the world, not to act, which I abominate, but to chronicle small beer and teach an army of little brats their letters; so this word 'wife,' and that word 'chimney-corner,' took possession of my mind, and a vision of darning stockings for a large party, all my own, filled my heart, and really I felt quite grateful to the little brute that was to give me all this, and he would have had such a wife as men never do have, still less deserve.

But one fine day that the theater left me time to examine his manner toward me, I instantly discovered he was deceiving me.

So I had him watched, and the little brute was going to marry another woman, and break it to me by degrees afterward, etc.