[Arcadian Adventures with the Idle Rich by Stephen Leacock]@TWC D-Link bookArcadian Adventures with the Idle Rich CHAPTER SEVEN: The Ministrations of the Rev 36/44
I have made a memorandum as follows, 'Should any doubts arise, on or after August first proximo, as to the existence of eternal punishment they shall be settled absolutely and finally by a pro-rata vote of all the holders of common and preferred stock.' Is that agreed ?" "One moment!" said Mr.Fyshe, "do you think that quite fair to the bondholders? After all, as the virtual holders of the property, they are the persons most interested.
I should like to amend your clause and make it read--I am not phrasing it exactly but merely giving the sense of it--that eternal punishment should be reserved for the mortgagees and bondholders." At this there was an outbreak of mingled approval and dissent, several persons speaking at once.
In the opinion of some the stockholders of the company, especially the preferred stockholders, had as good a right to eternal punishment as the bondholders.
Presently Mr.Skinyer, who had been busily writing notes, held up his hand for silence. "Gentlemen," he said, "will you accept this as a compromise? We will keep the original clause but merely add to it the words, 'but no form of eternal punishment shall be declared valid if displeasing to a three-fifths majority of the holders of bonds.'" "Carried, carried," cried everybody. "To which I think we need only add," said Mr.Skinyer, "a clause to the effect that all other points of doctrine, belief or religious principle may be freely altered, amended, reversed or entirely abolished at any general annual meeting!" There was a renewed chorus of "Carried, carried," and the trustees rose from the table shaking hands with one another, and lighting fresh cigars as they passed out of the club into the night air. "The only thing that I don't understand," said Mr.Newberry to Dr. Boomer as they went out from the club arm in arm (for they might now walk in that fashion with the same propriety as two of the principals in a distillery merger), "the only thing that I don't understand is why the Reverend Mr.Dumfarthing should be willing to consent to the amalgamation." "Do you really not know ?" said Dr.Boomer. "No." "You have heard nothing ?" "Not a word," said Mr.Newberry. "Ah," rejoined the president, "I see that our men have kept it very quiet--naturally so, in view of the circumstances.
The truth is that the Reverend Mr.Dumfarthing is leaving us." "Leaving St.Osoph's!" exclaimed Mr.Newberry in utter astonishment. "To our great regret.
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