His hand was shaking so that the match almost dropped from his fingers.
"I've been making a damn fool of myself," he said half aloud.

"A double damn fool! I've got to stop that talk about marrying, somehow--or keep away from her.

But I can't keep away.

I _must_ have her! Why in the devil can't she realize that a man in my position couldn't marry her?
If it wasn't for this marrying talk, I'd make her happy.

I've simply got to stop this marrying talk.