Advice, if I had known where to seek it, would have been most precious.

The words of Macbeth to the physician often occurred to my thoughts.

But there was no one on whom I could build the faintest hope of such assistance.

My father, to whom it would have been natural to me to have recourse in any practical difficulties, was the last person to whom, in such a case as this, I looked for help.

Everything convinced me that he had no knowledge of any such mental state as I was suffering from, and that even if he could be made to understand it, he was not the physician who could heal it.