[Mercy Philbrick’s Choice by Helen Hunt Jackson]@TWC D-Link book
Mercy Philbrick’s Choice

CHAPTER X
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When she was asked how it happened that she wrote them, she exclaimed, "I did not write that poem, I lived it one night,--the night when I came to Penfield, and drove through these streets in the rain with mother.

No vagabond in the world ever felt more forlorn than I did then." THE OUTCAST.
O sharp, cold wind, thou art my friend! And thou, fierce rain, I need not dread Thy wonted touch upon my head! On, loving brothers! Wreak and spend Your force on all these dwellings.

Rend These doors so pitilessly locked, To keep the friendless out! Strike dead The fires whose glow hath only mocked By muffled rays the night where I, The lonely outcast, freezing lie! Ha! If upon those doors to-night I knocked, how well I know the stare, The questioning, the mingled air Of scorn and pity at the sight, The wonder if it would be right To give me alms of meat and bread! And if I, reckless, standing there, For once the truth imploring said, That not for bread or meat I longed, That such an alms my real need wronged, That I would fain come in, and sit Beside their fire, and hear the voice Of children; yea, and if my choice Were free, and I dared mention it, And some sweet child should think me fit To hold a child upon my knee One moment, would my soul rejoice, More than to banquet royally, And I the pulses of its wrist Would kiss, as men the cross have kissed.
Ha! Well the haughty stare I know With which they'd say, "The man is mad!" "What an impostor's face he had!" "How insolent these beggars grow!" Go to, ye happy people! Go! My yearning is as fierce as hate.
Must my heart break, that yours be glad?
Will your turn come at last, though late?
I will not knock, I will pass by; My comrades wait,--the wind, the rain.
Comrades, we'll run a race to-night! The stakes may not seem much to gain: The goal is not marked plain in sight; But, comrades, understand,--if I Drop dead, 't will be a victory! These poems and many others Stephen carried with him wherever he went.

To read them over was next to seeing Mercy.

The poet was hardly less dear to him than the woman.


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