But if he does not obey his mother's commands--no matter how insubordinate or unmanageable he may be--the fault does not, certainly, indicate any thing at all wrong in _him_.

The fault is in his training.

In witnessing his disobedience, our reflection should be, not "What a bad boy!" but "What an unfaithful or incompetent mother!" I have dwelt the longer on this point because it is fundamental As long as a mother imagines, as so many mothers seem to do, that obedience on the part of the child is, or ought to be, a matter of course, she will never properly undertake the work of training him.

But when she thoroughly understands and feels that her children are not to be expected to submit their will to hers, _except so far as she forms in them the habit of doing this by special training_, the battle is half won.
_Actual Instincts of Children_.
The natural instinct which impels her children to come at once to her for refuge and protection in all their troubles and fears, is a great source of happiness to every mother.

This instinct shows itself in a thousand ways.
"A mother, one morning"-- I quote the anecdote from a newspaper[B] which came to hand while I was writing this chapter--"gave her two little ones books and toys to amuse them, while she went to attend to some work in an upper room.