"There was some fun then! You invented an howitzer, and it was hardly cast before you ran to try it on the enemy; then you went back to the camp with an encouragement from Sherman, or a shake of the hands from MacClellan! But now the generals have gone back to their counters, and instead of cannon-balls they expedite inoffensive cotton bales! Ah, by Saint Barb! the future of artillery is lost to America!" "Yes, Bilsby," cried Colonel Blomsberry, "it is too bad! One fine morning you leave your tranquil occupations, you are drilled in the use of arms, you leave Baltimore for the battle-field, you conduct yourself like a hero, and in two years, three years at the latest, you are obliged to leave the fruit of so many fatigues, to go to sleep in deplorable idleness, and keep your hands in your pockets." The valiant colonel would have found it very difficult to give such a proof of his want of occupation, though it was not the pockets that were wanting.
"And no war in prospect, then," said the famous J.T.Maston, scratching his gutta-percha cranium with his steel hook; "there is not a cloud on the horizon now that there is so much to do in the science of artillery! I myself finished this very morning a diagram with plan, basin, and elevation of a mortar destined to change the laws of warfare!" "Indeed!" replied Tom Hunter, thinking involuntarily of the Honourable J.T.

Maston's last essay.
"Indeed!" answered Maston.

"But what is the use of the good results of such studies and so many difficulties conquered?
It is mere waste of time.

The people of the New World seem determined to live in peace, and our bellicose _Tribune_ has gone as far as to predict approaching catastrophes due to the scandalous increase of population!" "Yet, Maston," said Colonel Blomsberry, "they are always fighting in Europe to maintain the principle of nationalities!" "What of that ?" "Why, there might be something to do over there, and if they accepted our services--" "What are you thinking of ?" cried Bilsby.

"Work at ballistics for the benefit of foreigners!" "Perhaps that would be better than not doing it at all," answered the colonel.
"Doubtless," said J.T.Maston, "it would be better, but such an expedient cannot be thought of." "Why so ?" asked the colonel.
"Because their ideas of advancement would be contrary to all our American customs.