I certainly understood from them that bishops are strange and terrible old men keeping a cruel secret from mankind.

I was misinformed.

When on my first appearing in episcopal gaiters in a drawing-room I cried out in a voice of thunder, 'Down! down! presumptuous human reason!' they found out in some way that I was not a bishop at all.

I was nabbed at once.
Then I made up as a millionaire; but I defended Capital with so much intelligence that a fool could see that I was quite poor.

Then I tried being a major.