'How's punkins ?' "'How's crops down your way ?' says another.
"Now there wa'n't nothin' real bright and funny about these questions--more fresh than new, they struck me--but you'd think they was gems from the comic almanac, jedgin' by the haw-haws.

Next minute a little bald-headed smart Alec, with clothes that had a tailor's sign hull down and out of the race, steps to the front and commences to make a speech.
"'Gosh t'mighty, gents,' says he.

'With your kind permission, I'll sing "When Reuben Comes to Town."' "And he did sing it, too, in a voice that needed cultivatin' worse'n a sandy front yard.

And with every verse the congregation whooped and laughed and cheered.

When the anthem was concluded, all hands set up a yell and looked at us to see how we took it.
"As for me, I was b'ilin' mad and mortified and redhot all over.